Mum said that my Uncle Daniel had made me a present. I do like presents, I like presents for me, and presents for you and presents that the secret people puts through the door when no one else is at home... I like to open them for everyone!
What's special about Uncle Daniel? He cooks stuff everyday for people and he makes me homemade organic jerky at his house and it makes me go a little bit crazy! Or may be a lot crazy!
I got some!.. It helps me with my cone of shame... it helps me not care about anything except getting the jerky in my belly. I love love love it!
Want to know the best bit after the jerky gets put away so I don't eat it all in one go??? Making sure that I got every single bit out of the packet! Thank you Uncle Daniel! You're amazing!
... So I got to take my new leg home and it was so weird... It was wrapped up so tight I couldn't bend it... One day I got it stuck on the front step behind me because it forgot to come with me... that hurt a bit...
I was given lots of little things to take to make me feel better, slightly wasted and in no pain... they were super yuck and sometimes fizzed up in my mouth! What the Dog was that about?? I ate a maggot and it crawled on my tongue, squirmy little worm and then it went pop! The fizzy yucky things were then put in my dinner and it made all my dinner disgusting! so I had to stop eating my dinner... I used to like dinner... then the yucky things went away and my dinner tasted yum again and as a treat I got all these extra little cream cheese balls! Totes Yum - I love them so much I just swallow them whole... and sometimes I get sleepy.
I got bored of sleeping on the same side... Dad bought the astro-turf from the garden inside so I didn't slide over around the house. Thanks Dad!
Both Mum and Dad have decided that they should carry me up and down the stairs... Not only do I think that it's stupid but I make sure I make it as awkward as possible and make all my legs and neck go straight and stiff... it's funny as!
And then one morning mum rubbed my belly and tickled my ears and cut my tight leg wrapping off and we found my leg underneath - it was naked and someone had done some crazy slice and dice and sticharoo on me!
Blue stitches are fun cause I can see them really well!
No licking though... no licking or touching or nibbling... otherwise it's time for 'the cone of shame'... no one likes the cone of shame.... To Be Continued....
Last week we went cruising in the car... I love it! the wind in my ears and up my nose, the new smells and sights and things we do whenever we get there... but we went cruising in the morning on a normal 'Why do you leave me?' day... and that's not normal....
We finally got to a nice shiny place where everyone was happy to see me and wanted to pat me... and then they wanted to touch me and prod me on my legs... I have a sore leg so I didn't think that was much fun. We seemed to be stuck in a small room forever and after a while I could hear all these other dogs calling out to me and they were saying all kinds of stuff... I could hear one dog asking where the ball was - like - the whole time!... and one dog saying it's a trap! Run! Get out while you can!... One dog sounded really sad and scared and was howling, I decided to hide under the table in the small room while my mum and dad talked to the tall friendly man who was showing them lots of bones! I really wanted one for breakfast but the tall man said I couldn't have it... I was totally hungry and everything! Then it happened... they left me... my family left me, at least I got to get a tour of the new shiny place... I then got to see the inside of a room just big enough for me! - it had a view of the people walking past so it was o.k... and it came with things that made me sleepy... I heard someone say 'I was wasted' but then I had a nap, I'd figured I find out what they meant later...
Later seemed like forever... I woke up from my nap and something was different... my leg was so sore... and they put some clothes on it?? What The Dog had they done?? I was really unhappy and felt sick and I didn't know where my toes had gone? Something wasn't right... Then I got to get out of my room with a view and I walked through a door to see my peeps!!! They must have finally realised they forgot me, they must of felt so stupid to forget something like me! We left the big shine-o-rama and I got to go cruising again! But it wasn't the same - Mum kept wanting to cuddle me in the backseat... Wish she'd stop touching me! And it was hard to look out the window as my leg seemed to be stuck... but at least I got to go home... mum said there was a 'cone of shame' waiting for me at home... sounds yum to me! I'm hungry!..... TBC...
I got my toys out in the weekend... I like to get them all out one by one and then pick which one is lucky to have it's eyes, ears or tails pulled off!
Sometimes I try to keep them alive for a little while so we can hang out together then other times they just have to have their legs pulled off and their tender soft white furry insides pulled out bit by bit until it looks like it has exploded! I do love a good exploding toy - I like the ones where the eyes are hard and I can pull them out of their funny little squishy heads! ...pop!
Every time I bring my toys out my mum puts them all back in their box? Now I just to go and get them all again...
Sometimes I carefully select a shoe from the shoe rack when no on eis at home to play with me... apparently they aren't toys... but they are fun to chew! I love shoe chews.... sssshhhhoooooo choooo's - Totes Yum!
Then there is my rawhide chew collection... and my chewy Hippo!
I love throwing these about the place and pouncing on them.
One day I will try to swallow them whole and regurgitate them back up because I haven't chewed them properly...
And best of all...
This is my Bucket of Bones!
Once I'm done chewing all the good bits off when it comes home from the butcher then I get to leave it all stinky until I chew it some more! I collect them and pick out a different bone when I want!
Jeddah Awesome Pants
My name is Jeddah Awesome Pants, I'm an American Staffy Rhodesian Ridgeback cross. I turned 7 years old in June and I have been in my forever home since January 2012.